Extra: Brad Wilcox on Get Married

According to Brad Wilcox, Americans — particularly university students — have lost the simple truth that friendships and family relationships add more to one’s sense of meaning than one’s education or work does. Wilcox and Great Antidote host Juliette Sellgren talk about how this truth has been lost to the progressive narrative of expressive individualism, careerism, and hedonism.

You can listen to the podcast here: Brad Wilcox on Get Married

Cultural values like expressive individualism, careerism, and hedonism encourage young people to find meaning in themselves, their work, and the pleasurable experiences in life rather than relationships such as marriage. In light of these values, marriage becomes less appealing. 

Yet, Wilcox points out that this anti-marriage narrative ignores that deep meaning and fulfillment in life come from the hard things. He likens fulfillment in life to hiking to the top of a mountain versus driving to it. The destination is the same, but the view loses much of its satisfactory value if you drive there. You only truly appreciate the beauty of it after striving for it. So, fulfillment in life comes from sacrifice for and commitment to someone. 

The anti-marriage narrative also assumes the superiority of single life. Rather than considering the many economical and emotional benefits of marriage, the cultural elites prioritize the individual as the best way of life. They embrace cohabitation as a low commitment middle ground and support all family forms as equally successful. Marriage becomes an unnecessary entrapment for men and women with nothing to be gained. 

In Wilcox’s book, Get Married: Why Americans Must Defy the Elites, Forge Strong Families, and Save Civilization, Wilcox examines this false narrative and highlights the lack of evidence for their claims. He encourages young people to defy the elite’s story and give as much attention to dating and finding a spouse as they give their future careers, to build families, and find significance in commitment to another. 

1.)   How is commitment to an education or work different from commitment to another person? Why might one be more fulfilling than another? 

2.)   How can we change the anti-marriage narrative to one that reveals the truth about marriage’s benefits? 

3.)   Studies show that stable relationships between two committed married people is a better environment for kids. Why might having children in marriage be better for the child and the parent? 

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